brrr

it's 3:47 am. i just came home from Pat Field's birthday party at Cielo. I decided not to wear a coat, and Gino's name wasn't on the list, so i stood outside freezing for half an hour wearing what amounted to a silk nightie.

it's weird. there were people from my past that i had expected to see there. and it's disconcerting to realize that most of them are dead or married, or just different now. the ones i do know, from back in the day, are so surgically altered it seems like I'm meeting brand new people.

it's 3:50am. I'm not drunk, I ate at Florent before coming home. I can't reach behind myself high enough to unzip my dress, I'm wearing tights I've owned since the late 80's, but it's my first time wearing them. They're cute, they look like a crossword puzzle, and in the boxes it says Absolut Vodka. Back when Absolut was the good vodka to drink. I'm wearing more makeup than a drag queen, so much that it's still all on, still looking pretty good. My apartment looks like Sephora after a sorority has been through, Jez is batting at my belt and i'm thirsty as hell. I'm sleepy, yet really awake.

It's 3:53am, and it's cold in here. The month is almost over, and for that I'm glad. I love winter, but man, I'm really ready for some warmth.